Understanding sexual abuse in men 

Sexual abuse by a person in a position of authority or power is deeply harmful, regardless of whether the perpetrator is a man or a woman.

Premature or coerced sexual relations with a woman in a position of power and authority can have serious consequences on a young boy’s development, whether the abuser is a mother, aunt, sister, grandmother, babysitter, or any other woman.

Forced sexual experiences can lead to feelings of anger, depression, and a range of emotional, psychological, and physical issues.

Abuse of this kind can have lasting effects and should never be viewed positively, regardless of the victim’s sexual orientation or perpetrator’s gender.

Additionally, since individuals under the age of 16 cannot legally consent to sexual relations with a person in a position of authority, it’s extremely inappropriate to frame these acts as an “initiation.”

This prevalent myth, reinforced by society, can fuel many prejudices against men who have been victims of sexual abuse.

As a result, they may hesitate to come forward out of fear of being stigmatized and often put off seeking help or support. 

While it’s true that some individuals who sexually abuse others were themselves victims as children, the vast majority of men who experienced sexual abuse as children do not go on to commit abuse later in life. 

Being a victim of sexual abuse does not define a person’s behaviour or future actions.

A positive response and support after disclosure are important factors in preventing the cycle of abuse in men who have experienced it.

A person’s sexual orientation is complex and shaped by many factors, not just a single event or experience. For instance, there is no scientific research that has found that sexual abuse influences sexual orientation.

However, premature sexual experiences initiated by an adult male or female can cause confusion in a child’s sense of identity and sexual orientation. 

This confusion may lead some boys to believe that they are homosexual if a man was involved in the abuse, but this is false.

Sexual abuse is a traumatic event with far-reaching consequences, regardless of the victim’s gender.

Boys can be deeply affected by sexual abuse and often face the added challenge of society’s reluctance to view them as victims, leading to feelings of isolation and silence.

Every victim of sexual abuse responds differently, but their reaction has nothing to do with gender.

When a boy or teenager is subjected to genital stimulation, even in an abusive situation, he may experience an erection or orgasm (physical discharge).

This applies to any type of sexual stimulation, such as visual, taactile, or auditory. 

However, this physiological response does not mean that the child was consenting at the time of the experience or that he understood what he was experiencing.

Perpetrators tend to use these physiological responses to manipulate the child into believing that they wanted it or even enjoyed the abuse, a tactic to silence victims.

As a result, many boys and teenagers who were abused experience deep shame and guilt, mistakenly believing they were complicit due to their body’s physiological response.

Men who sexually abuse boys are not necessarily homosexual, nor are men who abuse girls necessarily heterosexual.

While sexual abusers have preferences regarding the age and gender of their victim(s), the vast majority of abusers of boys are heterosexual, not homosexual.